Dealing With The N Word In Your Doterra Business

DoTERRA Home Business | Essential Oils Work Based Training Aromatherapy

Dealing with the “No” response in your DoTERRA Business is no easier than dealing with it in your day-to-day family life.  It’s hard,  isn’t it?  However in any direct sales company,  you need to get used to hearing “No“.  We have to learn how to effectively deal with this.  But first,  know that you are not alone.  Read on to learn how I personally deal with the dreaded “No” as I’ve grown my doTERRA direct sales business.

No Doesn’t Mean No

The first part of dealing with “No” is realising that people aren’t rejecting you. They are simply explaining that they are either not interested at the moment, or are definitely not interested, ever. So, what they’re actually saying to you isn’t “No”, it’s “Not now” or “Not ever”

Not now” and “Not ever” are two totally different things, and that’s GOOD for your business.  Saying “Not now”,  means they might be open later.  But not ever,  means they are unlikely to be open to it at any point.  “Not now” people are a challenge for another day. Give them time. Maybe you can get them to sign up to your blog, Facebook group, email newsletter, or whatever you use? They are tomorrow’s potential customer … a positive opportunity!

Today,  we’ll consider the “Not ever” response.

I Had A “Not Ever” Today

This afternoon,  I received a message from a lady who is fast becoming a good friend.  We had been talking recently about how she was considering joining doTERRA as a home based business to expand on her existing use of the products.  I opened her email immediately because I was really excited.  I thought “This is it! She will be the perfect C&C Builder for me and she’s in a new area.  Unfortunately,  when I opened her email and read it,  her answer wasn’t “Yes.”  It wasn’t even just a “No,  not right now.” She actually told me that she was joining a competing company instead!

It Triggered A Normal Emotional Response

As you can imagine,  I felt so disappointed.  I felt dejected and let down.  I felt like blaming myself for not being capable of getting her to enroll with me instead.  It hurt because I’m working so damned hard to find good business builders,  and finding them is like finding a needle in a haystack.  I even felt…. personally rejected.  A negative little voice whispered,  “She didn’t choose me.”  But you know what?  All of that negative emotion isn’t the place you want to come from when you reply.  All of those feelings around how you deal with that “No” response?  They are all about you.  They aren’t about the person you are replying to.  You want the reply to focus on the other person instead of yourself.

Take Emotions Out Of Your Response

Seriously.  You can have your cry or be angry later.  Emotions are healthy and natural.  Dealing with “No” responses can bring them out in full force.  Emotions are only to be expected in these situations!  So, go talk to a friend, better still, apply your emotional oils.  Do whatever you need to do, even if that is putting on a pair of gloves and knocking seven bells out of a punchbag.  However,  when you actually reply to this “No” response,  do everyone a favor.  Sideline those perfectly normal emotional responses from the game.

Remember that you are your brand, and your response directly affects the reputation of your business. This is, first and foremost, NOT about you or any feelings you may be having.  Keep your reply professional, polite and positive. The Three P’s, let’s call it.  Depending on your relationship with the person,  you may want to reassure them that this doesn’t impact your friendship.  Otherwise, simply wish them well on their venture, perhaps even offer them some tips on how to be succesful.  Be the bigger person, as my Father used to say.  This is a huge opportunity to leave a good name and impression on your doTERRA business.  Don’t waste it.

It’s Easier If You Wait Before Replying

If your emotions are truly in the way,  give it a few hours or even a whole day.  It’s perfectly okay to wait until you can reply in a kind and thoughtful manner, in fact, it’s often easier to step away from the source of your emotion (the email) to calm down before answering.  However,  you will need to respond within a day or two.  Otherwise,  it’s going to come across negatively to the other person.

Note: If you’re dealing with someone face to face, you’ve got to learn to master your emotions. Make an excuse, such as needing the toilet, to get space for a breather, perhaps even apply your “emergency” oils from your pocket or handbag! You don’t have hours to wait before responding, only minutes, so practicing deep breathing can be a lifesaver in these circumstances!

Dealing With No & 3 Key Things To Include In Your Reply

Now that you’ve stepped down from your knee jerk emotional response,  there are three important things you should craft into your response.  Including these three elements will leave the best possible impression and showcase you in the best light.  It will also go far to preserve your current and future relationship.

1.  Respect

Respect their decision.  Don’t try to talk them out of it or manipulate them to change their mind.  This is one of those times that you want to simply listen.

 2. Validation

Validate their decision.  Recognize that they have put careful thought into their decision-making process. Most importantly, recognise that it is their decision to take, not yours! Acknowledge that and validate their reasons if they choose to share them with you. Don’t try to undermine them by tearing down their reasons, you will only make yourself look petty.

3. Leave Them Feeling Good

Every contact you make when running your doTERRA business should have this as the end goal.  Always leave the other person feeling good about themselves.  Yes,  even when they have just said “No,  not ever”.  Especially then.

Preserve The Relationship

You never know how things may turn out down the road.  But what I can tell you for sure is that they will remember exactly how you responded to them.  Let’s not close doors.  They might not be your next doTERRA business builder,  or even a customer anymore,  but you still have things in common  They may already be a close friend or a potential one.  Even if you don’t know them that well,  you have some form of a business relationship.  Maintain that, since you never know what the future holds.

Why Preserve The Relationship?

Why bother preserving the relationship?  They said,  “No,  not ever.”  I won’t see them again,  right?  Um, wrong.  Maybe that new company won’t work out as well as they thought.  Or maybe it does and they run into someone looking for YOUR company instead of theirs.  Who are they going to refer?  What if the new company doesn’t carry a certain product and they want to buy an item or two from yours quietly “on the side”?  There are so many scenarios like this!  Don’t close doors.  Instead,  continue to be the warm, friendly, caring soul that people know you as!  This lets them know in a clear non-verbal manner that you are there for them if they change their mind.

Let Go Of Your Emotional Investment

This is one of the hardest parts, personally speaking.  I’m one of the most emotionally invested doTERRA business builders out there.  I put my heart into everyone I enroll.  In our doTERRA business,  we spend time answering questions and helping people as they are considering enrollment options.  I answer wellness related questions and brainstorm with essential oil solutions.  We develop a genuine, warm relationship and I do everything I can to help.  I take the time to befriend people because I care about them.  I care about their success and wellness.  I believe that this makes me extremely good at what I do.

However,  I’ve learned that when dealing with a “No,  not ever” response,  you absolutely need to step back from that.  Let go of all of the emotional investment you had in this area.  You are no longer their “go to person”.  Set healthy boundaries within that relationship,  and stick within them.  Emotionally,  you are moving on to invest in the next person who will say “Yes!”.

Refer Them Back To Their New Upline

Your reply to a “No” response is all about being kind and professional.  However,  it isn’t about being a doormat and allowing that person to take up your time excessively.  In the above example, when dealing someone who joins a different company,  or even someone else within doTERRA,  you are acting well within your healthy boundaries to refer their questions back to the their new upline.  Let’s be honest, that new upline is the one getting all the benefit,  so they have the responsibility to be doing all the mentoring and heavy work.  If any question takes longer than a quick 2 sentence reply or we’re being asked more than just one or two questions,  we should absolutely refer them back to their own upline.  Your doTERRA business knowledge is a benefit for you and for those who choose to invest in you.  You should not feel obliged to spend hours sharing that knowledge with a person who choses to invest in someone else. The value/energy exchange is all wrong in that situation.

Move On To Your Next Yes

Lastly,  and most importantly, the most effective method of dealing with “No” is to move on to your next “Yes!”.  I use my frustration and disappointment to drive me forward instead of backward.  Maybe it’s time to join Facebook groups to make new contacts,  or follow up with previous contacts.  Think about setting up a one on one chat with someone else who is close to enrolling.  The very best way of dealing with a “No” in your business is doing something solid to move forward,  focusing on finding your next “Yes”.  Think about channeling all of that emotional energy into an email newsletter to your follow-ups right away.  Aim to contact 5-10 new people on the same day as you get that “No.”  Don’t let dealing with “No” get you down,  let it motivate you!

Dealing with negative responses is just one of the challenges that we face as business people. We have to be consciously aware of our emotional state at all times, and the practice of meditation and mindfulness can help with that. Speak to me, Eugenie, if you’re interested in learning more about these topics.